Tag Archives: Domina101™

My Contributions, your purpose

February 21, 2016

Note: I choose to publish this entry to assist confused individuals who misunderstand the definition of Dominance and how it IS in real-life.

Whenever you offer something of value, people who contribute nothing and do nothing of their own, will often have the audacity to take offense and even threaten you.

Domina101™ Tip: ALWAYS clarify their value to Your REALITY. In this way, You give them an opportunity to evolve from ignorance — Good Karma for You! What they choose to do with Your Gifts is their karma.

Dear Mistress Didi*,

You’re not having fun parties any more and what’s with all this self-help crap? If You’re not going to get back to business, i’m leaving your mailing list.

‑ mama-told-me-i’m-special (the name I dubbed this creature)

* * * * *

Attention:

I’m in the be-served business; NOT the service industry.

I create Events that please ME. While I know that My generosity and altruism will be unappreciated by those who are lacking any of their own, I have no interest in accommodating the whims of whiners.

Value Reality Check:

1) I’m a REAL Domme. I maintain My Domain My Way on My Terms. Anyone who has anything to do with Me and My Domain are invited GUESTS.

2) I have created, and continue to create, public and private events on a grand scale for guests with refined taste, skill, and integrity — something seriously lacking in the majority of what has become The Scene today.

3) I have conducted, and continue to conduct, numerous classes and workshops in a wide variety of techniques and topics in the realm of My Expertise.

4) Along with My Ask Mss Didi* Offerings, I create various opportunities for personal evolution via Fetish Appreciation with My Domina101™ and Superior submissive™ mentoring programs, contributing to The DommeSalon™, and a plethora of other training opportunities.

5) I wrote My Complimentary Fetish Etiquette Guide, How To Present yourself To A Mistress as a primer for both Dominants and submissives to improve the abysmal lack of manners that contributes to the deterioration of the elegance of The Scene. you need to read it.

I improve The Scene with My Contributions that many have benefited, and continue to benefit from.

And who are you, really?

1) you have offered nothing to or for Me and/or Mine.

2) you have not donated to any of My Charitable Works.

3) you have not attended any of My Events, though I was gracious enough to comp you and a guest since you complained about a lack of finances.

4) you are not pleasant personally nor visually. you make no effort to offer any beauty, talent, and certainly, not charm. So, you are not a consideration in the creation of any of My Events.

5) The only thing you have done in My Reality is ask Me to offer My Expertise — which I graciously gave more than once — for your “community” organization for NO compensation, collaboration, nor support of anything that I’ve done or do. you have, however, served to prove this truth:

Do not cast your pearls before swine, lest they be trampled under foot.
— Matthew 7:6, KJV

I wasn’t aware that you were on My Mailing List. So, in truth, you removing yourself from it will have the same use for Me as you have always had in My Domain — none whatsoever.

you may take solace in the fact that NONE of what I do is for or about you or anyone else who offers NOTHING, and whines about what I DO.

For further clarification on the situation, read Why you Don’t & Won’t Have What you Want.

Always MY Pleasure & The Best,

Mss Didi*

*****

If you have a question that has NOT already been addressed, you may Ask Mss Didi*. Remember your manners…

I’m a Domme, not your mom.

More of Mss Didi*s Words of Wisdom

10 Domina101™ Workshop Tips

February 18, 2015

I continue to receive an inundation of requests for help on topics that are covered in the Basics of what I teach in My Domina101™ Workshops, which I conduct to raise funds for My Charities. While I understand that We’re busy people, I remind you to read what I’ve already provided in My Ask Mss Didi* blog before contacting Me. I took the time to write it and I generously share it with you for FREE.

The reason I offer My Wisdom From Experience for FREE is because:

1) I am disgusted by the state of The Scene and its continued decline in quality, civility, integrity, beauty, and intelligence – which is the same reason I produce My own events for lack of any I’d care to attend;

2) Money is NOT My Goddess and I believe in The Laws of Karma and Attraction: what you put out comes back to you multiplied; and

3) I know that The Universe will always test your commitment to your Greatness, so I share how I deal with lizard-brain thinking and creeps of all kinds to assist the worthy in maintaining the positive energy to withstand the barbarian assaults.

The tips that I present below are the simple concepts that are further explained and explored in My Domina101™ Workshops.

10 Domina101™ Workshop Tips

1) Clarify. Download and/or read My Domina101™ Workshop Prep Guide to identify, define, and refine your past-present-future choices and desires for Your Domain Your Way. You do this not only for Your clarification, but also to gain the maximum value of what I share.

2) Reality Check. Understand that the vast majority of the folks on these anything but “social” sites are self-loathing, losers whose sole purpose is to play the make-wrong game. The vast majority of those are fakers-shakers-takers-noise-makers who are there to waste Your time by manipulating “free sessions” – in most cases, their primary desire is to abuse You. These creeple believe that they gain some sick sense of value by attempting to steal your energy. This is why a tribute is always required. See Being Superior: My “How To” Process and Why you Don’t & Won’t Have What you Want

3) A tribute is a commitment to honor Your time and energies and it weeds out the worthless. The commitment is to and for You from Yourself as well as from the submissive. Just because the hoochies-with-whips have creeple insisting that a tribute is financial, does not make it so. It is for You to decide what and how a tribute should be given. My motto is: From each according to her/his ability, to each according to My desires. Depending upon the relationship and the worthiness the submissive has demonstrated in real-time, I have allowed submissives to bring a tribute as simple and inexpensive as 1 flower to add to My floral arrangement. Under no circumstances do I permit access to My Domain without tribute. Period.

4) Make creeple useful. No matter what You do, the self-loathing will jump to attack You. Without engaging them, use them for Your purposes and amusements. See Make Rudeness Serve You, Flip-Flopping Attempts to Top, and The Last Word

5) Purpose. Determine the purpose of the submissive and only reward her/him for proper service. Make sure that Your “punishment” is not playing into their fetishes, which only yields You being taken advantage of. See Manipulation Tactics: Who’s Topping You?

6) Friends and Associations. Sadly, We live in a world where You are judged and mistreated for (and often by) those You associate with. Choose Your associates with the same discernment (maybe more) that You use to choose Your subs. See Fabulous & Guilty By Association

7) Gossip Control. Have more than You show, say less than You know, and only tell them what You want them specifically to know. See How To Deal With Relationship Gossip

8) Educate Yourself. Learn how to receive so that You are not Your own worst enemy. Invest in fetish education, first-aid training, and stay up-to-date with the legalities of Your location. See Fetish Safety & 50 Shades of Foolishness

9) BE SAFE. See Safety Tips For Dommes

10) Self-Control is the ONLY real control there is. You are responsible for Your Domain and who has access to and influence in it. See The True Discipline, Check In & Center of Attention and Chill Out Training Technique: The Tapping Solution

To participate in the next Domina101™ Webcam Workshop and help Me raise funds for My Charities,

Click Here

Always MY Pleasure,
Mss Didi*
www.PartyDomme.com

*****

If you have a question that has NOT already been addressed, you may Ask Mss Didi*. Remember your manners…

I’m a Domme, not your mom.

More of Mss Didi*s Words of Wisdom

Being a Lifestyle Dominant for Her entire life, Mss Didi* has explored various aspects of the BDSM and D/s Scenes including 24/7 relationships, slave ownership, Professional Domination (before it became synonymous with “hoochies with whips“) and Fetish Event Planning. Mss Didi* has benefited from an extensive education in the functions of the human body and psyche, holds a Master’s Degree in Rehabilitation Therapy and is currently working on Her PhD. As well as being the Founder of The Fetish League, Mss Didi* is a Model, Speaker, Author, Fetish Facilitator, Certified Hypnotherapist, Certified Psychotherapist, Certified Nutritionist, Certified Aromatherapist, and a graduate of The Institute of Culinary Arts with a specialty in vegetarian cooking. In Her* quest to change the public’s negative view of Fetish to a positive understanding of Fetish as Therapeutic Art, Mss Didi* promotes Fetish Appreciation through Her workshops, performances, and ClassicFetish™ Events. She* believes that the goal of the Dominant-submissive relationship is self-evolution for both to grow towards becoming the best that W/we can be as individuals, to each other, and to The Whole.

How to Deal with Piggy Dom/mes

A Domina101™ Tip

December 27, 2014

This post is in response to a few conversations regarding an incident where a Dominant made a few enemies due to her lack of courtesy. Let this be a guideline for You when You’re “Domme-tripping,” and for how to deal with head-trippers.

Never expect anything from a pig except a grunt.
~ #quote My Fabulous Grandmother

You know that thing: the oh-so-Dommey-Dom/me who condescends to You right off the bat? Even knowing that You’re a Domme? Not that condescending without a good reason is ever ok…

My recent experience of that thing while celebrating the Holiday Spirit: I asked a few Dommes I’ve been aware of if they would like for Me to mention them and their works in My Holiday Newsletter. One lovely, Domina said thanks and didn’t give Me drama-not-on-Broadway where drama belongs. The other one is the perfect representation of what I’m writing here and I’ve made her useful for a Domina101™ training. Now:

1) I am a very gregarious person and a strong supporter of Women Supporting Women;

2) I am in NO way desperate for content for My Newsletter or for anything that I do; and

3) I am not asking for anything from YOU other than exactly how you would like Me to present your work in My Newsletter, which is more for-and-about-you than it is for Me. If one chooses to look at the situation as someone doing something for someone else (which I don’t), I’m doing YOU the favor of free promotion – not the other way around. I am generously sharing My resources with You.

We all know that technology today makes it possible to research the person you’re dealing with before you make a complete turd of yourself. And yet, it is My experience on a regular basis that all these silly creatures do is look at My photos and immediately make up ignorant- fantasies about Me that are extremely limited… The really gruesome just look to pick out specific words in something you and I post online about OUR experiences to play the make-wrong game. And those who believe that they are as ugly as they are, are outright rude in person – as if somehow, everyone observing will not peg their behavior as jealousy. Pity these people; there is something seriously lacking in the quality of their existence that makes them hostile and combative. Pity them, but definitely put them in their places – beneath You.

While I do pity them, I find it helpful to understand the motivations for their rudeness to prevent Me from wanting to completely eviscerate them. I am a Responsible Sadist whose motto is:

Don’t start none, won’t be none – I finish it.

How To Handle The Piggy Dom/me

1) Recognize that s/he is intimidated by You and needs to convince herself of her false-sense of superiority. People who suffer from inferiority complexes often believe that if they can force their idea of dominance onto you, that they will prove to the world that they are superior to everything and everyone else.

2) Whatever You do, do not become hostile. That’s exactly what they want You to do! They can only feel alive through negative experiences because that is the punishment of people who focus on lower-level activities and expression. These are the people, after all, who usually don’t exercise, eat well, or read, and who rush to watch judgment-TV with bowls of junk food-stuff on a daily basis. That is the recipe for toxicity and they are toxic in mind, body, and spirit. So, they most certainly can’t feel good about themselves and they want to disrupt the flow of everyone who not only lives well and feels good, but certainly those who look good! These are also the people who are quick to call YOU conceited for having a sense of style – which, in My Opinion, is Our Duty To Society.

3) Dismiss them. As always, You have the choice in how You wish to respond. I usually treat them with pleasantries and respect right up until the moment they serve their purpose for Me dealing with them in the first place. Then, I immediately change My tone of communication to a clearly-dismissive one. This lets them know that they are no longer of importance and shakes up their comfort zone. The best part is that I always “plant a seed of torture” – Domina101™ participants know what I mean! Ahhh, delicious!

A favorite story recanted among My Associates is of a male dominant who had the audacity to think he could bark orders to Us at an event. You know the type: the guy who thinks that every woman – especially Dommes – really want to sub to him. It was immediately clear to Me that this person would never be someone or something enjoyable or of value to Me or Mine. So, I chose to “nip it in the bud,” as the expression goes. I stood in front of him, pointed My finger at him, laughed genuinely, turned to My submissive and walked away, laughing. For the rest of the event, I specifically let him see Me enjoying Myself with worthy humans and not once did My eyes glance in his direction. I made him disappear. As usual, the gruesome grapevine passed along his attempts to defame Me, but witnesses addressed his rudeness before I ever got wind of their remarks – not that I care about gruesomes have to say anyway. They only serve to add salt to the wounds of My sprouting seeds of torture.

4) Most importantly, let it be known that You don’t care about them. They have served your purpose and are unworthy of further attention. People who do not care for themselves want you – anyone – to care about them. Because they know that they are bereft of redeeming qualities, the only tool they have to be noticed is gruesome behavior. And that’s where pity can be a most useful tool for You.

As a Responsible Sadist, I find comfort in leading them by the nose into seeing just how ridiculous they are. Because I am a firm believer in Karma, I always find ways to give a reality slap that permits offenders the opportunity for personal growth – which is good for My Karma, which is always My primary motivation. What they choose to do with My Gift is their karma.

Always MY Pleasure & The Best,
Mss Didi*
www.PartyDomme.com

*****

If you have a question that has NOT already been addressed, you may Ask Mss Didi*. Remember your manners…

I’m a Domme, not your mom.

More of Mss Didi*s Words of Wisdom

Note: I choose to publish this entry to assist confused individuals who misunderstand the definition of Dominance and how it IS in real-life.

I’m in the be-served business; NOT the service industry.

Value Reality Check:

And who are you, really?

you may take solace in the fact that NONE of what I do is for or about you or anyone else who offers NOTHING, and whines about what I DO.

Related articles:

10 Domina101™ Workshop Tips

Click Here

Related articles:

A Domina101™ Tip

Never expect anything from a pig except a grunt. ~ #quote My Fabulous Grandmother

Don’t start none, won’t be none – I finish it.

How To Handle The Piggy Dom/me

Related articles:

Never expect anything from a pig except a grunt.
~ #quote My Fabulous Grandmother